Single guests are the easiest people to seat and the easiest to seat badly. They take one chair, they have no partner to keep next to them, and they fit into any gap. That's why they end up in whatever seat is left over, at a table of strangers, with the couple next to them talking to each other all night.

The fix isn't complicated. Seat each single guest with people they know or will want to know, and treat that as seriously as any keep-together rule.

Start with who they know

Before you decide where a single guest sits, write down who else in the room they know. For most singles, the answer falls into one of three groups:

  • They're part of a friend group that's coming. Easy. They sit with that group, and being single doesn't matter.
  • They know one other person well. A cousin, an old flatmate, a colleague. Seat them at the same table and, if you can, next to each other. Add it as a keep-together rule so it doesn't get lost when the chart changes.
  • They know only you. A friend from a class, a work friend from another city, a neighbour. These are the guests who need the most thought, and there's a section on them below.

Do this for every single guest, not just the ones you're worried about. It takes ten minutes for a list of 150 and it's the step people skip.

Should you have a singles table?

A table made up entirely of single guests is the classic answer, and it's divisive. Some guests love it. Others feel set up, or feel you've announced their relationship status to the room.

It works when:

  • The guests are roughly the same age and in the same stage of life.
  • Most of them already know each other, or at least know of each other.
  • You don't call it the singles table. Not on the escort cards, not in a speech, not to their faces. It's table 9.

It doesn't work when the only thing the guests have in common is that they came alone. A 24-year-old university friend, your recently widowed uncle and a 50-year-old colleague share nothing but a status, and they'll know that's why they're sitting together.

A mixed table is safer: a couple of couples, three or four singles, people with something in common. Nobody is the odd one out, and the singles still have each other to talk to.

Guests who know only you

These guests matter because they came for you and they'll spend the reception with strangers. A few things help:

  • Seat them with the most sociable table you have. One relaxed friend who talks to everyone does more than a perfect match on paper.
  • Match on something real. Same line of work, same home town, both new to the city, both into climbing. You're the only person who knows both of them, so you're the only one who can spot it.
  • Put two of them together. Two guests who each know only you have that in common, and it's an easy opener.
  • Consider a plus-one. If a guest will know nobody at all, offering them a plus-one is a kindness, and it solves the seating question. The plus-ones guide covers who usually gets one.

Where not to put a single guest

  • At a table of couples who all know each other. Four couples from the same friend group will talk about each other's houses and children all night.
  • At the kids table as the "helpful adult". Unless they've offered, it's a job, not a seat. The kids table guide has better ways to supervise.
  • In the last seat left. If one chair at the back is empty after you've seated everyone else, look at who's in it before you print.
  • Next to their ex. Obvious, but it's easy to miss when the ex has brought a new partner and you've been thinking of them as a couple. Add it as a keep-apart rule.

Odd numbers and empty seats

Singles are also how you fill a table. A round for ten with four couples has two seats left, and two single guests who know the couples fill it neatly. Work the other way too: if a table has one empty seat, move a single guest in rather than leaving a gap, but only if they'll know someone there.

Don't break up a couple or a family to make the numbers work. Leave the empty seat. The table math guide explains why a few spare seats across the room are useful anyway.

Older single guests

A widowed grandparent or an unmarried aunt is a single guest too, and they usually want to be near family, not with "the singles". Seat them at a family table, close enough to the couple to see the speeches, and away from the speakers. If they need help getting around, put them near an exit and the restrooms, and next to someone who'll look out for them; the guide to seating elderly and disabled guests covers the room and the table in detail.

Doing it in Seatwise

In Seatwise, the rules above take a few clicks:

  • Give guests a Group when you paste the list (Name, Household, Group), such as "University" or "Work". Auto-seat tries to keep guests with the same group at the same table, so a single guest with a group label ends up with people they know.
  • Add Keep together for a single guest and the one person they know. Auto-seat treats it as a rule, not a suggestion.
  • Add Keep apart for exes. If they end up at the same table anyway, the Conflicts tab lists the pair.
  • Check the leftovers. After Auto-seat, filter the guest list by group and look at who's alone at a table with none of their group. Move them by hand and lock the table.

FAQ

Is a singles table rude? Not if the guests have something in common besides being single, and you don't call it that. If they don't, a mixed table is better.

Should single guests sit together? Two or three singles at a mixed table works well. A whole table of strangers who happen to be single often doesn't.

Where do I seat a single guest who knows no one? With the most sociable table you have, next to someone they share something with. Or offer them a plus-one.

Do single guests get their own escort card? Yes, like every guest. The card shows their name and table number, and nothing about who they came with.